A Single Woman's Journey To Motherhood


Location: Washington, United States

I began my TTC journey in January 2005. It finally worked with the 5th IUI and along came Eliana! I started trying for a second (T42) a little over a year later, and was thrilled to get pregnant on the second try this time. Jacob soon joined our family! Not sure if I am done at two, but come along for my journey in motherhood. If you stop by, please leave me a short note! I like to know when I have visitors. :)

Friday, December 30, 2005

Home for the holidays

If you have noticed a long lull on my blog, I have been home (where I grew up) for the holidays. I did try sending two blog posts from the Vancouver airport during my 4 hour wait, but for some reason they did not show up here.

My trip was both eventful and uneventful in different ways. I spent the day on Friday hanging out with my parents with many trips to the grocery store, LOL. People have always said that as you get older you begin to appreciate your parents more...While that has been happening slowly for me over the past few years, it was mostly as long as we were apart. However, this year, I was finally getting to the place where I felt comfortable with them and was much more able to enjoy spending time with them. Good thing too because the uneventful part of my trip was that I usually spend about 75% of my waking hours with friends, but that just didn't happen this year. In fact, on Christmas day while our guests were napping and my parents were out delivering gifts to some friends of theirs, I sat at home and cried off and on for probably a good two hours. I would like to chalk up to pregnancy hormones because I have definitely started crying (or at least getting teary and choked up) at the drop of a hat these last few weeks, but I think it was a mixture of sadness of losing the closeness to my friends and just all the unknowns about to start in my life.

Anyway, on to the eventful stuff. My uncle, his girlfriend and my grandma arrived on Friday night (the 23rd) followed much later (around 2:00 am) by my cousin and his girlfriend. We had expected one more cousin with his wife, but they couldn't come in the end. We had a nice dinner and did some visiting. Saturday morning (Christmas eve), we all woke up quite late to have a big breakfast. My grandma helped my mom in the kitchen and seemed fine. Until she sat down at the table...where she just stopped. It was like her battery ran out. She was breathing, but not responding to anyone talking to her. At first, my dad and his brother thought they would take her to the hospital, but it seemed to get worse and my mom called 911 and we waited for the ambulance. It probably took them about 10 minutes to get there. They took her vitals, gave her some fluids and oxygen and worked with her probably for about 15-20 minutes or so and by the time they were taking her out to the ambulance to go to the hospital, she was conscious again. My dad and uncle spent the day in the hospital with her and it took about 5 hours before they finally saw the doctor. By that point, she was feeling herself again. They finally discharged her about 7:00 pm with just a decrease in one of her blood pressure medications (the only diagnosis was low blood pressure..and was it ever low, the paramedics said 60/37).

In the evening, mom and dad wanted to deliver some presents to some of their friends (and we had to go back to the hospital because we couldn't find the pill we were supposed to half for her..) and I went with them. I was surprised to get a beautiful hand knit baby blanket from one of their friends (also the mother of one of my friends). I certainly had not expected to get baby gifts from my parent's friends and it was greatly appreciated.

Christmas morning we opened gifts as usual and I had another gift from my parent's friends: an adorable hand knit baby sweater and bonnet. Santa brought me tons of baby clothes as well...with the tags still on them LOL (this always happens at my house...guess Santa gets too busy;). From my parents, I received a playpen, some perfume, and a check for my crib! We had a lovely Christmas dinner and then my cousin and his girlfriend headed back to Calgary as he had to work on Boxing day.

Boxing day I went shopping with my mom and dad a little bit and we mostly just visited with my uncle and his girlfriend. I had a chance to visit my friend and her kids in the evening and bring them their gifts. The kids were sick so she planned it so that they could open their gifts from me and head to bed, and so far, knock on wood, I haven't gotten sick. :)

Tuesday morning, my mom and I went through all of my baby clothes (yes, MY baby clothes...I think my mother saved everything I ever wore!) and made piles of clothes I would keep and those she would give away. Later, I met up with two friends for lunch. That evening, I enjoyed some cards with my parents, but my dad and I (it was a game you play in pairs) lost miserably. LOL. Wednesday, we went to a matinee and played some more cards.

Thursday, my parents have a housekeeper come in the morning so we had to spend the morning out and about. We went out for breakfast, went and cashed my check from my grandma at the bank, went shopping, etc. While shopping at the mall, this tall boy (not much of a boy anymore I suppose...LOL must be about 27), recognized me and said hi. You may recall this summer when I was having dreams about the family I used to babysit (three boys and a girl) as a child, this was the oldest. It was so great to catch up with him. We still had some time to kill after the mall, so we all went and got our hair cut LOL. I had been meaning to cut mine for a while as my class lost our food drive competition and I said I would cut my hair, so it is nice that that is one less thing I need to do this weekend. Finally, we figured it was late enough to go home. In the afternoon, one more of mom's friends stopped by with a baby gift: a cute little bunny sleeper and hooded towel. Soon after supper, we left for the airport for my flight home. While waiting for the plane to arrive, there was a girl who looked slightly familiar who came up to me and said hi, by my name. I was so embarassed because while I did remember who she was, I could not remember her name. We visited for a little bit while she waited for the plane to arrive bringing her husband home, and I waiting for the plane to arrive to take me home. My flights were fine. The connection in Calgary was a little late, but what really held me up was waiting for baggage in Vancouver. It took about 45 minutes to get the bags and then I still had to drive home...I got home around 2:00am to a rather frantic phone call from my mom since I had expected to be home about one hour earlier...

And that, was my 2005 "home for the holidays".

I hope you had a wonderful Christmas and I wish each and every one of you a happy new year!

Sunday, December 18, 2005

Poll: Old letters

I want to take a quick poll of my readers.

Do you keep old letters from friends? Old boyfriends? How long do you keep them?

I am once again trying to clean out the nursery (I now have a deadline of Tuesday AM since my cousin is coming at that time to paint the walls) and sorting through all this stuff I have kept with me through the years. When my parents moved out of the house I grew up in a couple years ago, I had to clean out my old room and threw out 3-4 shoeboxes full of old correspondence from friends, family, pen pals, etc. I didn't go through most of it because I just wanted to finish. But now, I am going through some of the stuff I have here, and I am tempted to throw it all out, but there is a part of me that says I need to keep things...like the letters from two men dear to my heart who passed away in 1999 and 2000. Or letters from my ex-boyfriend that I still pine away for from time to time (despite the fact that he and his girlfriend are pregnant and getting married!). How do you part with these things?

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Good appointments

So, yesterday, I met with the doula. I wasn't sure what to expect or what to ask her or whatever, but I ended up really enjoying her visit. I think we spoke for about an hour and a half or so, maybe even two hours. I ended up hiring her and I will see her in about a month. She also offered to attend childbirth classes with me which was a nice surprise. I am probably going to take her up on that offer, at least for a couple of the classes.

Today, I had an appointment with the OB. I was very shocked at how low my blood pressure was and I still think she made a mistake...it was 106/58, very low for me. The nurse and the doctor were both happy with it though so I guess that is all that matters. The heart rate was 133 which I thought seemed slow, but he was happy with that too. He also mentioned that my uterus was a good size, 4 finger widths above my belly button. I will have to check the pregnancy books and see if that is really what it should be...I was happy to be told it was good, just want to verify "normal". I have also gained 4 pounds, puts me up a total of 5 pounds this pregnancy which is on the low side if you are of average weight, but I am far from that so it, too, seems to be good. The only thing he was concerned about were now my after breakfast lunch numbers and so he has added 10 units of insulin with breakfast now as well as with lunch. That is 10 units of insulin (fast acting) on top of the already 1000mgs Metformin and 1.25mgs glyburide I take in the morning...I tell you, I feel like a walking pharmacy some days. In all, things seemed to be going swimmingly. Good enough that I still don't have to go back for another 4 weeks...

Tuesday, December 13, 2005


Frantic last minute house cleaning in progress...am meeting with my doula for the first meeting in about 15 minutes...will update later. :)

Saturday, December 10, 2005

Procrastination hits again...

I have been up for 5 hours and have still not even attempted to find the information I need to do my assignments. Assignments you ask? Well, you may recall way back when that I was working on my "professional certification" and started this course back in January of this year, yes, January, and have received a gentle reminder (well, swift kick in the pants may be more like it) that I must finish the work before January 15th of 2006 if I do not want to take the whole stupid thing over again...Thing is, I just hate and despise this professional certification thing so much that I just can never find the motivation to do it...If I remember correctly, I only have 3-5 assignments left, but they require thinking and planning and researching and trying things out in my classroom (to be honest, I am seriously considering making it all up). ARGH! Calgon take me away!

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

You know you're pregnant when...

Today, I had an "aha! I am really pregnant!" moment.

I have joked with coworkers lately that I am on the hourly plan (to the bathroom that is). Today, I went to the bathroom after school, went back and helped some kids for about 45 minutes and then debated whether I should go again on my way out...But on my way to the bathroom, someone walked in front of me and got there first, and I thought, why bother, it is only another 20-30 minutes. So, off I went and on the way home I remember I need to buy more candy canes for my students. I stop at Safeway, and as I am walking around the store picking up candy canes and mint hershey's kisses (all for the kids! I am such a pushover!), I get a tickle in my throat and cough. Immediately, I say to myself, well...I mutter under my breath but it was actually outloud which probably freaked someone out LOL, "can't cough until you can pee". This was mantra until I got home....

Yep, I am truly pregnant.

Sunday, December 04, 2005

I am a kid again!

LOL. OK, so maybe I'm not REALLY a kid again..but this morning at church, the pastor asked me to come to the front for the children's sermon for the baby. LOL. I felt so silly and have no idea why he did that, LOL, but hey, I got a candy cane and a Christmas tree ornament filled with sweetarts. LOL

Look at that countdown!!

I can't believe it, the countdown says 103 days left...103!!! I can't believe it, I swear the last time I looked, it was in the 200s. LOL.