The local SMC
Finally, I made it to a local SMC (single mothers by choice) meeting today. It was out in Redmond and I left about 10:30, stopped at Safeway to get gas, Starbucks latte and a box of oranges for the meeting. I made it about 10 minutes early so that was good since I had no idea where I was going;)
It was at the house of one SMC and her toddler daughter and there was one woman there already with her two kids, 7 and 5 I think she said. Slowly more and more women showed up and in all I think there was about 15 or so women there plus kids from 3 1/2 months to 7 years.
There were women in all different stages: 5 or 6 with children, 2 pregnant, 2 tryers (plus me...I guess I would be considered a tryer since I am not a thinker anymore...), 1 woman looking into adoption, and 2 thinkers....actually I think there was between 1-3 other women I never spoke to so I don't know what stage they are in.
I was quite nervous going to the meeting as I don't tend to do well in group situations where I don't know anyone but I was pretty proud of myself. :) I talked with most people and it was just so encouraging to see so many women with children and/or pregnant. It was also encouraging to see at least two women who were overweight too as this was one of my main hesitations of going to these meetings...don't ask me why, I am strange like that.
One of the women has two childre all ready and is currently pregnant with an unplanned pregnancy. She is looking into adoption for this third child and even asked the woman looking into adoption if she would be interested.....(she isn't...she wants an older child, at least 1 year old, and preferably sibling group from Guatemala). I did speak up and said if only this were 6 months from now (that she was looking into adoption...baby will be born in about 6 months) that I would be extremely interested. Of course, she hadn't really asked me..but I did put it out there. I really felt like saying "pick me, pick me!!", but on the other hand I have come this close to trying and really want to at least give it a good try. I did find it encouraging that she wants to adopt her baby out into an alternative family (SMC or lesbian couple). I found that encouraging because I am so scared of not being chosen for adoption because I am single....
Anyway, I enjoyed the meeting and am so glad I went. I was welcomed by everyone and look forward to going to more of these meetings! (hopefully with my own baby someday soon...)
It was at the house of one SMC and her toddler daughter and there was one woman there already with her two kids, 7 and 5 I think she said. Slowly more and more women showed up and in all I think there was about 15 or so women there plus kids from 3 1/2 months to 7 years.
There were women in all different stages: 5 or 6 with children, 2 pregnant, 2 tryers (plus me...I guess I would be considered a tryer since I am not a thinker anymore...), 1 woman looking into adoption, and 2 thinkers....actually I think there was between 1-3 other women I never spoke to so I don't know what stage they are in.
I was quite nervous going to the meeting as I don't tend to do well in group situations where I don't know anyone but I was pretty proud of myself. :) I talked with most people and it was just so encouraging to see so many women with children and/or pregnant. It was also encouraging to see at least two women who were overweight too as this was one of my main hesitations of going to these meetings...don't ask me why, I am strange like that.
One of the women has two childre all ready and is currently pregnant with an unplanned pregnancy. She is looking into adoption for this third child and even asked the woman looking into adoption if she would be interested.....(she isn't...she wants an older child, at least 1 year old, and preferably sibling group from Guatemala). I did speak up and said if only this were 6 months from now (that she was looking into adoption...baby will be born in about 6 months) that I would be extremely interested. Of course, she hadn't really asked me..but I did put it out there. I really felt like saying "pick me, pick me!!", but on the other hand I have come this close to trying and really want to at least give it a good try. I did find it encouraging that she wants to adopt her baby out into an alternative family (SMC or lesbian couple). I found that encouraging because I am so scared of not being chosen for adoption because I am single....
Anyway, I enjoyed the meeting and am so glad I went. I was welcomed by everyone and look forward to going to more of these meetings! (hopefully with my own baby someday soon...)
posted by Katrina | 12/12/2004 08:17:00 PM
7 Comments:
Katrina - Glad you finally made it to an SMC meeting and felt welcome. I had one this weekend also. There are actually two local groups that I go to, the one that is closer is pretty much all moms. The one I went to this weekend is split between moms and tryers. I have really become friends and hang out with a number of the other tryers in the area.
I have been meaning to ask you...just out of curiosity...when you have to do your glucose testing, how do you do it? Are you going for blood? I can't believe it can take ten tries. I have seen people mention that when they have trouble getting their blood drawn they drink lots of water and that seems to help. I am a regular blood donor and have no problems, but when you talk about it...it just seems so painful.
Happy Holidays! Debbie
Way to go! I'm proud of you for going and I'm glad that you felt welcome.
And you really shouldn't worry about being overweight. It's not that big of a deal, really. I have friends who are both smaller and larger than me, and I don't see their size, just how wonderful they are inside. You're really a great person, embarking on a great adventure, and I'm sure that's what people will pay attention to, rather than shaking their heads when they see that you're not a size 0.
Glad you went to a meeting. Seems like the worry leading up to something like that is much worse than actually doing it. I always figure if I am worried about something then I have to do it just to overcome my fear. Plus I am an adrenaline junkie.
I can understand about the weight. I have many members of the local group I run who are always concerned about attending the first meeting because they are BBW's. But you know everyone has something they worry about, but to others it is a plus. My bald head gets negative comments, but others can't help but run their hands over it. Some of my friends love a woman with some weight on her, others like them skinny. Just be you and there will always be good people who will accept you as you are.
Deb, The truth is I still don't know why I have such a problem getting my fingers to bleed. The way it works is you have this little thing that looks kinda like a pen and you prick your finger with it. Then you should get a blood drop and you place the test strip of the monitor to the edge of the drop and it kinda "soaks" it up. My problem is that I often don't get enough blood. If you don't get enough blood and you try to put it on the test strip, you get an error and need a new strip. The strips are SUPER expensive and my insurance doesn't cover them all, so I am getting better at being able to tell when I have a big enough blood drop.
Carrie and JamDaddy, thanks for the encouragement. I know it is silly and I shouldn't be so self-conscious about my weight, but I just can't help it sometimes. It doesn't help that I have been gaining weight the past couple weeks....this does not make me happy. I swear it is me eating nuts with snacks all the time to get my protein with my carbs...the only eating rule the nurse told me about the diabetic diet....appointment with the nutritionist isn't until january still.
Hiya -- it's obvious! The anticipation is much more intense than the event.
Being around people that have done it (or will do it) is great for you! Congratulations, and of course now you know that there was little to be worried about.
If only we could know that beforehand...
I am SO looking forward to seeing you at Christmas!
Instead of pricking your finger prick your leg. Well maybe your cheek. I know when I prick my finger I get no blood, but when I get a teenie tiny cut shaving I bleed like a stuck pig, lol. Maybe your leg will be like that, ever bleed when you cut your leg? Oh, hope I did not put you in an uncomfortable position, you do shave right?
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