Location: Washington, United States

I began my TTC journey in January 2005. It finally worked with the 5th IUI and along came Eliana! I started trying for a second (T42) a little over a year later, and was thrilled to get pregnant on the second try this time. Jacob soon joined our family! Not sure if I am done at two, but come along for my journey in motherhood. If you stop by, please leave me a short note! I like to know when I have visitors. :)

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Bad mommy

So, I have already earned bad mommy of the year award. Last week after my mom left, I was absolutely determined to build up my milk supply as every thing you read says that if you put the baby on to nurse every time it is hungry, your milk supply WILL increase. So, I became very very stubborn and worked hard at this the entire week. I gave her a bottle of formula (after breastfeeding) only before bed and upon our last awakening in the night (basically when I just can't handle it anymore as we are nearing feeding every 30 minutes-1 hour). I was exhausted. My content little baby became a screaming maniac every time I put her down. And if I wasn't putting her down, I was almost always putting her on to nurse.

I couldn't take it. I didn't know what had happened to this child. Finally, while talking to my mom who couldn't understand why I couldn't do ANYTHING with this previously very content baby, she said "I bet she's hungry."

And so it was. And so it is. And while I have not given up on breastfeeding, I have grudgingly accepted that I must supplement with every feeding. Poor thing, she eats from me for about 20-30 minutes, and then still takes 2-3 ounces of formula...yeah, she was hungry alright.


Blogger lukossmom said...

Oh, that doesn't make you a bad mommy, that makes you a great mommy! You are doing exactly what she needs. And I give you a ton of credit for keeping at it as long as you have. My daughter was so miserable that after 6 weeks I quit completely. And we were both happier for it!!! So you do what she needs and everything will be perfect, no matter what the source. Sounds like you are doing a fabulous job, and she is adorable. Makes me want another little peanut to cuddle.

April 04, 2006 3:47 PM  
Blogger Chas said...

I will probably be writing on my blog about this very same thing. My baby is only one week old, but feeding in general has been a great big pain in the rear. We have to supplement with formula, because my milk hasn't come in great yet either and I have no idea how much she's really getting from me. I'm using an electric pump in between feeings and I've resorted to a breast shield temporarily. At this point, I'm OK with the formula for now.

April 04, 2006 6:00 PM  

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