Name:
Location: Washington, United States

I began my TTC journey in January 2005. It finally worked with the 5th IUI and along came Eliana! I started trying for a second (T42) a little over a year later, and was thrilled to get pregnant on the second try this time. Jacob soon joined our family! Not sure if I am done at two, but come along for my journey in motherhood. If you stop by, please leave me a short note! I like to know when I have visitors. :)

Saturday, February 19, 2005

Long day of nothing..

LOL. Yep, that is right. My very first day of midwinter break, and I have done nothing. Well, that is not ENTIRELY true. I did sweep and mop the floors (well..just the hard floors, not the carpeted ones). But that is about it. I still have my nice long list and hope that I will get busy on it tomorrow.

I did spend a considerable amount of time today church shopping on the net....again. I know that I am partially to blame with my shyness, but I just feel that after attending a church for 6+ months, I should know SOMEBODY's name, and SOMEBODY should talk to me. Is that really too much to ask??

My church shopping really did not turn up many options. I found the church I was originally going to try out when I moved to this house. But their contemporary service doesn't start until 9:45, and I have quite enjoyed going at 9. I find that if it is much later, I get busy doing something and don't make it. Well, I may try it anyway after I am doing my Master's and therefore have less reading and papers to do.

The church shopping is rather limited because I really do not enjoy very "traditional" services. I was raised in the Lutheran church and have nothing against them, but I like the upbeat music with the hand clapping, something that I have never found in a lutheran church. I generally choose Pentecostal or non-denominational churches, though I did attend a baptist church (with nice contemporary music) when in Maple Ridge. I enjoyed that church as they had a single woman's bible study that I got involved with and met people through.

The truth is, I have had absolutely no luck here in WA with churches. I left one church because it occured to me one day that after 6+ months, I was sitting in a pew completely alone. Not one other person in the church was sitting alone but me. I almost started crying right there (and did rather uncontrollably on the way home). That was the last time I went to that church. The funny thing is that about 6 months AFTER I left that church, they started sending me invitations to women's groups and young adult (which I am too old for) events. They still do...I suppose I could try them again, but the feeling of sitting alone (and it wasn't just that week..it was most weeks) is still very fresh in my mind.

The church I have been attending now is slightly better. There is usually someone else in my row, but near the other end, and apart from the shake hands and greet part of the service, noone talks to me still. I went once to the single's bible study when it was on Saturday nights (now it is happening Sundays during the 9:00 service...my preferred service). Everyone had kids but me, most were divorced and none my age (they were probably late30s - 50). The whole reason I have seeked out churches with singles groups is because it is too painful to be the only single childless person amidst a crowd of marrieds with kids. I never went back.

So, you see, I have a dilemma. I just don't know what to do/where to go. I really want to meet people and make friends and be a sociable human being...LOL. But I just don't know how. If you have any suggestions on churches in the area, let me know.

8 Comments:

Blogger Deb2You2 said...

Katrina - Sorry the church shopping isn't going very well. I haven't found one either, but that is because I am too lazy to go and all I do it think about it. I have a friend who is an ordained minister in the Bay Area. She sent me a listing of churches in CA. I'll see if she knows anyone or can recommend a church up your way. Seattle, right? But, you are outside the city a bit I think. Let me know and I will call/email her tomorrow. Sigh, you make me feel guilty about not doing more myself. I was talking to a friend the other day about the decision to be a single mom and God. I was telling her that I am sure that God is okay with my decision because it will bring me closer to him. For some reason, I feel no strong compulsion to find a church for me, but feel very strongly that a child should be raised in a church believing in God. She hadn’t thought of it that way and realized because of her guilt, she was letting the decision take her away from God. She prayed about it and felt so much better afterwards. Church should be about community and acceptance. I agree that if you haven’t found that, you should keep looking. I remember this one church that I went to once and I had 3 or 4 people come up and talk to me and make me feel welcome. I don’t even remember why I didn’t go back. Maybe I should one of these weeks soon. Deb

February 20, 2005 5:33 PM  
Blogger Katrina said...

Hey Deb. I live in Everett, and am open to anywhere in the Lynnwood/Mukilteo/Mill Creek/Everett/Marysville area. Of course, it would be great if it were near to me, but I am pretty open...

This morning there were quite a few people who sat in my row, but still noone spoke to me outside of the meet and greet. I just don't know what to do...maybe I should hold off changing until I am done my master's (next month) and try to go to some things outside of the services..

February 20, 2005 6:16 PM  
Blogger Katrina said...

I bit the bullet tonight. I emailed two of the "gclubs" at my church. Gclubs are a new women's group thing based on interests. I emailed the Gamin'Gals (board games) and Patterns of Grace (quilters). let's see if they write me back...

February 20, 2005 9:58 PM  
Blogger JamDaddy said...

Hmmm, it really sounds like the shyness thing is holding you back. I have gone to many churches of many denominations and usually meet people because I go meet them. However, I was raised Catholic and they have no problem with drinking, drinking is social, being social leads to getting friendly, getting friendly leads to other things, hence the large families.
Maybe you should get there early and just try attending the various bible study classes before services. I have found that in the classes introductions are required, hard for you, but only the first time. Good Luck!

February 20, 2005 10:07 PM  
Blogger Psych-o-Mom said...

sorry about the church-going bust....I am a cradle-Catholic, but have often thought of defecting....It's funny because, unlike you, when I go church shopping, I hate when people approach me. I want to listen, pray, and get the hell out of there! Around here, everyone wants to come up and shake hands, get you to stay for coffee...Seems strange that you didn't find that. I'll probably just stay Catholic, because we are notoriously shy and usually don't interact at services. Good luck in the future!

February 21, 2005 12:20 PM  
Blogger Katrina said...

Psych-o-mom I know what you mean because I have felt that way some times too...not wanting them to talk to me. But what I am really looking for right now is somewhere where I can meet people and make friends, i guess. Maybe I should join the Catholic church..LOL. (just kidding...)

JamDaddy - I have no problems drinking when I am not trying to get pregnant. :) LOL. :) I am trying to get more involved with things, so let's see hope that helps. I am there early always...this is why I end up in a pew alone...if I was late I could choose to sit down where there are people, but since I don't know anyone, I don't hang out in the lobby until the music starts...I go in and sit down.

February 21, 2005 12:52 PM  
Blogger JamDaddy said...

Wait, I just gave you a scenario where drink leads to getting pregnant, lol. Never go early and sit, go early to class or arrive a bit late. If going early does not work, change! Wear a name tag list your name as available. Slide down the row next to that other alone person. Don't touch them though, that is to much change and they might scream. But you can introduce yourself. Intros are only embarrassing for the first 5 seconds but the gift of a meeting can last forever. You never know.

February 21, 2005 1:09 PM  
Blogger carrie said...

I'm not the best person to give advice on finding a church and feeling accepted, since my views of organised religion are not exactly positive and I haven't been to a church service in over 5 years.

I do hope that you are able to overcome your shyness and meet some people so that you feel more comfortable. Just remember that it's what's inside you that's important. Sometimes you may have to take the first step, but once that initial contact is made, it gets easier.

February 21, 2005 6:54 PM  

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